Amidst a sea of situationships and disposable dating scenarios... here's a 5-step love-life passenger upgrade. Helping you steer clear of folks who are not on the same page and become magnetic to your ideal partner type:
This guide to finding love in 2024 is specifically for you if:
You identify as being an adventurous, passionate human who's either single or working on bettering a relationship.
You're clear that you're ready to move beyond toxic connections, repeated patterns in dating and love and be open to focusing back on your own pleasure and what you want to create in your life.
A part of you wants a healthy, aligned and sexy love in your corner, but you've likely lost faith that the right partner actually exists out there...
Well let me be your love bubble-bursting fairy godmother with this healthy-attraction-proofing guide to finding YOUR special version of love in 2024.
This is an abbreviated version of the very first practices I do with my love coaching clients! So enjoy this freebie and let's get you partnered shall we?
One:
If you could genuinely find a healthy, sexy love that fits your current lifestyle... Who would they be and who would YOU be in that relationship?
Get ready for a fun, creative love brain-dump:
Put some music on that makes you happy.
Grab a notebook and pen. Set a timer for 10 mins and write down all the qualities you desire in a partner.
Funny, supportive, giving.
Get specific.
How do they make you feel?
Include the answer to this important question:
Who do YOU want to be in this relationship?
Generously received? A co-creator? Hot?
When you're clear on these things, it's so much easier to recognize when a new potential relationship or dating scenario is not a right fit.
If they don't make you feel how you want to feel...
Or if you don't enjoy who you are in this dynamic...
Close it down asap and come back to your vision (step three).
Two:
What would finding love, do for your life? How would it make you feel? What would change for the better if you had it?
Grab your notebook again and write down the answers to these questions. Get detailed in what you feel as you'll be using this to fuel the next step.
We're flipping the script from: all the ways a relationship may hinder your already-existing lovely life and freedom (let's temporarily put those worrying thoughts aside for a moment), to focusing on how a relationship might amplify, support or elevate you!
Think far beyond what you've experienced in the past. There's so much more out there, and you can begin attracting it, simply by believing it.
Three:
Close your eyes and luxuriate in a 5-Senses Visualization of your future love. Yummmmm
Take all the information you've gathered so far and allow yourself visualize an ideal future love scenario. Let yourself experience this reality as though it has already come to fruition, with all of your 5 senses activated.
After reading this list, close your eyes if that feels comfortable
Imagine yourself in your newfound or created love relationship
What do you see around you that tells you you've achieved this?
What do you hear?
What do you smell?
What to you feel inside or touch with your hands?
What do you taste in your mouth?
Give yourself the permission to experience this beauty for just a moment.
You are in essence, opening your heart and nervous system up, in readiness to receive this reality! This is yours for the experiencing and you're in the process of creating it as we speak! How exciting :)
Four:
Check in to see if there are parts of you resisting the possibility of finding love.
After you've completed the visualization practice. Scan your body and thoughts for any part of you that may not "believe" you can achieve this.
Maybe a part of you thinks this is only for "other people" or that no one like who you envisioned actually exists out there...
Let this part of you say all the things they have on their mind. Listen attentively like you're listening to a child speak.
And then wrap this part of you up in a blanket of love.
Imagine you're holding this little doubting part of you and sending them love and safety.
Our doubting thoughts will always exist, but we can decide what part of us takes action towards what we truly desire.
The scared and doubting part of us... or the more empowered part of us that can help soothe it's fears.
5- Embody your chosen reality every. single. day.
Now that you've decided what you want your future love life to look, smell, feel like... Keep that experience fresh in your mind, body and nervous system daily!
A few ways you can do this:
My favorite and client favorite: Choose a song that fits the right vibe and dance as though you already have this reality in play!!!
As you're walking down the street, driving, getting ready for work... imagine yourself walking, talking, dressing like that person who already has this love in their life.
Before you go to sleep at night, take 5 minutes to feel your chosen reality in the 5 senses.
Doing one of the above is great, doing them all is golden!
Desafortunadamente: My new favorite Spanish word, means "unfortunately"...
We are not taught how to love, receive love or attract love in school.
These are things we learn to get better at, throughout our lives. And it all starts with being intentional.
A few words by Pepper Schwartz, a relationship expert and sociology professor at the University of Washington:
“You can work on yourself. You’re not a finished product unless you’re dead.”
Indeed this is true... you're a work in progress of infinite potential.
Next Step...
Join me for more of this juicy love goodness by taking the following
"What's your Healthy Love Archetype" Quiz!
Be sure to share your results and sign up for my weekly Love Letter so we can stay in touch.